Mom2Mom & Dirty Dishes

It's been a while since I've posted. I was asked to be a presenter for a Mom2Mom group in one of our local congregations. I've been studying, praying and pondering for several months - wondering if there was anything of any worth that I could share with these sweet ladies. I worried that I wouldn't be able to fill the time I was given - I ended up cutting stuff out as I was speaking and still went over the time they had allotted for me. This is the second time I've been with this group of ladies and I enjoyed them so much. I appreciate the idea of moms mentoring other moms and wish I had taken advantage better of the resources available in my own church through Relief Society when I was a young mother. I think I had the idea that I had to do it all on my own. Not sure where that came from - maybe because my mother passed away shortly before I got married and I just didn't feel like I could be vulnerable with someone else enough to say: 'Help'! I was wrong. I should have reached out more. There was so much wisdom available to me that I didn't utilize.

A Christian mother (Rachel Jankovic) recently wrote on her blog: "Growing up in this culture, it is very hard to get a biblical perspective on motherhood... Children rank way below college. Below world travel, for sure. Below the ability to go out at night at your leisure. Below honing your body at the gym. Below any job you may have or hope to get." She then adds: (and I LOVE this!) "Motherhood is not a hobby, it's a calling. You do not collect children because you find them cuter than stamps. It is not something to do if you can squeeze the time in. It is what God gave you time for."

As a mother - you are one of the most influential persons in the life of your child. Like Esther who was willing to sacrifice her life for a nation if need be - mothers are also willing to sacrifice all for their children. And we do in many different ways - sleep, adult interaction, lifestyle, and sometimes identity! How many years was I known as "Amanda's mom" or "Millie's mom"? That's not all bad - they were great girls and I was happy to be their mother - but sometimes I wondered who I had become in the process. I think I did a decent job of developing my talents and staying involved - but it is difficult when you are in the thick of it all to keep that balance.

I love some of the resources that I have found on the Power of Moms website, which is found here.

I would encourage young families to give your children the stability of a few well-chosen traditions. Family traditions tie love strings around your family. If you can start them early, they're one of the best organized offenses you can come by.

There is a song by Scotty McCreery called "Dirty Dishes" that you can listen to here. Let me share the lyrics with you...it puts things in perspective a bit.

Momma hollers "Supper time,
And don't make me tell you twice.
Wash your hands and wipe your face.
The table's no place for your toys,
And try to use your inside voice,
Don't dig in 'til we say Grace."
So we put down our forks and bowed our heads
And then she prayed the strangest prayer ever said:

"I wanna thank you Lord,
For noisy children and slamming doors.
And clothes scattered all over the floor.
My husband workin' all the time,
Draggin' in dead tired at night.
My never ending messy kitchen
and dirty dishes."

We all got real still and quiet,
And daddy asked, "Hon, are you alright?"
She said, "Dear, ain't nothing wrong,
Noisy kids are happy kids.
And slamming doors just means we live
In a warm and loving home.
Your long hours and those dishes in the sink,
Means a job and enough to eat.

So I'm gonna thank you Lord,
For noisy children and slamming doors,
And clothes scattered all over the floor,
A husband workin' all the time,
Draggin' in dead tired at night,
A never ending messy kitchen.

For my little busy bees
Beggin' mama, mama can we please?
Always wantin' me to call their name.
Loads of laundry pilin' up
Crayons crushed into the rug,
And those little sticky kisses
And dirty dishes."

How grateful I am to have been a mother on the receiving end of sticky kisses!
Motherhood may not have always been what I thought it would be - it was often so much more than I could ever have imagined!

HELP!

I need your help. I'm speaking at a Mom to Mom group at a local church in a couple of weeks. I've read, I've studied, I've pondered and prayed and I think I've finally kind of, sorta narrowed down what I want to say. But I would love your feedback. If you are a mother - I know you had visions of what being the perfect mother would be like. Share with me how that vision and the reality of motherhood differ - and what are your goals this year to be a better mom? Will you take more time for yourself? Will you say no less often? Will you 'not sweat the small stuff'? I would love your feedback.
Thanks....
...and the women at Mom to Mom thank you also!

Pondering on Motherhood

I've spent a fair amount of time today thinking about the events that transpired 27 years ago. The time when our very first daughter was born into this world - as I've always liked to say: "Her coming to earth day"! I look at the beautiful women she and her sister have become and it humbles me greatly to know how our lives have intersected. They are such incredible human beings - and I don't say that because of anything that I have done as a mother - but because of the beautiful spirits they had when they received their earthly bodies. They are 'good' - they are 'wise' - they are 'kind'. They are great examples to me and I will forever feel blessed to be their mother and to call them my daughters. There are 23 months between these two girls - and they are more than sisters - they are best friends.

As a young mother, there are so many mistakes to be made. Everything is new and scary. And this is a LIFE that is depending on YOU to do the RIGHT thing! My mother passed away right before I got married - so that lifeline of wisdom wasn't there for me as a young mother. How grateful I am for the women, the sisters that I rubbed shoulders with in the Relief Society of our church. That is something that is so terrific about our church. No matter where you go in the world - you can find a congregation of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and within that congregation will be a group of women - the Relief Society. They do offer relief, they will buoy you up when you don't think you can make it through one more sleepless night or change another outfit that has been spit up on, or survive the 2's, 3's and everything else that is to come! I do have to say that my daughters were a joy to have in our home. And my heart breaks a little each time I think of them being 1,000 miles away. Sometime in the future they will have babies of their own. So even though I, as their mother, am still able to give advice and love, I am far away. So again - those sisters in the church will be there for them, and for that I will be grateful.

Who do you know that might be needing a little relief and how might you help them? Maybe they need an hour or two 'away' - a movie with their husband - a friend to just sit and visit and have - you know - 'grown-up talk'! Plan how you might be just what someone needs this week. Be open to the possibilities, listen for those whisperings of the Spirit that let you know when you are needed, then take action!

By blessing the lives of others - your life will be blessed beyond measure.